Let go and let flow
An itchy and scratchy week changes tempo and yields surprising fruits after we opt to let go and go with the flow.
The week had been productive but we both ended Friday feeling slightly itchy and scratchy. Maybe we had been indoors too long or had reached the end of our tether with all the distractions and interruptions. Whatever it was we needed to get out.
“Let’s go down Conrad Drive to the Taproom,” suggested Chantal, “We’ve wanted to go back for a while.”
“Good idea,” replied Matthew, “Let’s go early.”
We didn’t leave as early as we intended. It was already dark when we got on the road and the traffic was heavy. Even though we did not have far to go, Conrad Drive was flashing a line of headlights coming our way. The street side parking strip was full and we had missed the open spot on the other side.
The way out was blocked by cars who had not found spaces and the traffic hummed past us in a whizz of lights and wind. No luck with the other side either as the car in front of us grabbed that spot.
Uncertain and aimless
“Where to now?” asked a disgruntled Matthew.
“Mmmm, not sure, hey,” sighed Chantal, feeling irked.
“Let’s just drive and see what shows up.”
We wanted pizza and salad. In spite of the simplicity of the meal, it’s not that easy to find a combination that suits our tastes. Who would think that making a good pizza is so difficult?
“Let’s try Satori,” said Matthew.
Another place we had not been in ages, often packed full, it looked as if there were still open tables. We parked and walked in. We had a choice of tables and settled in against the wall.
They were out of stock of the wine we wanted. Not a great start but we let go to the experience. The alternative red was really tasty, the pizza and salad were good. Warmed by wine and with food in our tummies, the itchy and scratchiness faded away.
No fancy moves
Chantal does yoga almost every day. She follows a few yoga teachers on YouTube and does the class on her own online in the sunroom. Matthew has also started doing some online yoga classes too. Shorter in length and beginner friendly, he has found the stretching beneficial.
Although doing online classes is very convenient, there is something different about doing a class with other people. Chantal started attending a Thursday morning yoga flow class in person, held very conveniently, around the corner. It is small and the participants are older.
“We’re not here to show off our matching yoga outfits or our fancy moves,” explained the yoga instructor, “We are here to work intentionally and slowly with our form and breath.”
Yoga is still a very personal practice but having others in the room creates a special energy. We move together, laugh as we wobble and breathe loudly through the more challenging poses.
A yin experience
On Saturday morning we joined a yin yoga class facilitated by the same instructor. Matthew’s first experience of yin. It had taken some convincing to get him there. He was the only man but he laid his mat out at the back and settled in for a good stretch.
Yin yoga is different in that the poses are held passively for a longer period of time: between 2 to 5 minutes. The aim is to relax muscles completely to allow the deeper tissues to stretch and lengthen.
Props like bolsters, blocks, cushions and blankets are used to support the positions and make them more accessible and comfortable. The challenge is to hold the pose without fidgeting to cultivate a meditative, mindful state.
It helps to use the props, no matter how supple or flexible you are. The support allows you to let go into the pose, rather than hold on, thereby getting the full benefit. Matthew found himself propped up on all sides as he folded into his pigeon pose.
“What a great way to start the weekend,” said Matthew at the end of the class.
Although challenging in a different way, we felt refreshed, open and relaxed by the yin practice, ready for the rest of the day.
Let go and let flow
We let the rest of the day unfold. There was no grasping or designing. No need to control or direct. While Chantal went off to attend a special product launch with a group of special women, Matthew met up with Tristan.
We had separate but equally engaging experiences. Although the venue of the launch was loud in colour and sound, it did not deter from the fascinating stories and joyful ladies supporting one of their own.
Matthew and Tristan cheered with the enthusiastic Orlando Pirates fans that had filled their chosen venue, to watch their team play. The rise and fall of the roars and groans accompanied their meal and had them smiling at the camaraderie.
Neither of us had really known what to expect of the places we were going to and we certainly had no set outcomes. It wasn’t really a conscious decision but it had us enjoying our evening and afternoons more heartily.
Sometimes life doesn’t always give you what you want and it can make it feel like you have the equivalent of a rash. Chafing against life can leave you red and sore. But when you just let go and let life flow it often gives you what you need.
Cue the Rolling Stones.
Until next time.
Yours in feeling,
Chantal & Matthew
The Certainty Deficit in men’s major championship golf
Norman, Mickelson, McIlroy. Three players across thirty years of men’s major championship golf. Greg Norman never won a major in the United States. Phil Mickelson finished runner-up at the US Open six times. Rory McIlroy waited fourteen years for the Masters. All of them had the leads at some point. Their bodies wouldn’t let them finish.
The story of how the Certainty Deficit has shown up at golf’s major championships, from Norman at Augusta in 1996 to McIlroy at Augusta in 2026.
Credits for this issue — Images: 5th Place
Written by
Chantal Dawtrey
Supporting women, especially in midlife and beyond, to navigate life transitions · Emotional fitness coach
Chantal supports women, especially in midlife and beyond, to navigate life transitions. She designs and delivers data informed digital programmes that build organisational emotional fitness. She helps people move beyond habitual patterns into greater awareness, agency, and well being.
With over 15 years of coaching experience and more than two decades in facilitation and human development, Chantal partners with individuals, teams, and organizations to build emotional resilience, enhance self-awareness, and develop sustainable well-being strategies.
Her primary focus as a coach is supporting women, especially those in their 50’s and beyond, to navigate profound life transitions with clarity, steadiness and self-reconnection. Finding answers to questions about identity, purpose, belonging and desire to an emergence, a reclamation and a return to self.
If you're going through a transition and would like support, let's talk.
Matthew Green
Reducing the Certainty Deficit in high-performing people and teams · Emotional fitness coach
Matthew works with athletes, performance teams, and anyone who wants to reduce the Certainty Deficit in their situation or context.
The Certainty Deficit is the space between what you can do and what your body will let you do when it counts. It is context-specific and situational. A person or athlete can have zero deficit in one situation and a significant one in another.
The body holds beliefs that keep the Certainty Deficit in place. These beliefs run deeper than self-talk and faster than any conscious strategy. When they shift, the ceiling shifts, and new possibilities arise.
Matthew is also an emotional fitness coach who supports individuals to live and lead from a place of inner clarity and stability. The work is somatic-first, practical, and grounded.
If you're seeing a pattern that current approaches haven't shifted, let's talk.
My origin story: Why elite athletes underperform when it counts
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