We really need to get out more,” remarked Chantal after a particularly long day stuck indoors in the office.
The day had felt directionless. Little had been accomplished. A report we had been working on for months had ground to a halt in a steaming pile of data analysis that was wrong. We had to start again. From scratch.
Feeling unresolved with a layer of itchy and scratchy, Chantal set out. With no real destination, just out. Of the office, of the house, of the same environment that was starting to feel closed in and mildly claustrophobic.
Spreading stiff and dusty wings
Pre-lockdown and the Covid years we were veritable social butterflies. Engaging in interesting experiences was a big pastime for us. Matthew, the friend maker of our partnership, got us to meet lots of fascinating people.
Being shut in and shut out over those pandemic years, the loss of income, the difficulty finding business and the grey and depressive environment impacted our ability and willingness to get out and about. We hunkered down and stayed in.
Can it be that after over four years since the first lockdown, we are only now starting to feel the need to spread our stiff and dusty wings and get out a bit more? Why has it taken so long? We honestly don’t know, really. Other than doing some deep diving into the last few years, to analyse and uncover, which we don’t really have the appetite for, we can look more comfortably at this year, half of which has already swum by.
2024 started with a flurry of projects that folded over each other and left little social time. Positive, exciting work, but energetically taxing. Layered over that were family losses with Matthew losing his father, new arrivals as Chantal became a grandmother, and several weeks of flu fighting. We are now through all of that and we feel physically healthy and emotionally strong. Ready to step out again.
Connecting and catching up to say goodbye... Chantal and friends, Laura and Mandy (right) who is relocating to spend more time with her parents.
Full and socially nourishing
This past weekend by some nifty coincidence we had no Saturday work and a full socially nourishing two days. On Saturday Chantal went to a farewell party for a friend who is relocating to another province to be closer to her parents. The event offered an opportunity for her to meet up with friends she has not seen in some time, one of which she has not seen for maybe twenty years.
It was a time for recollections, memories and tales of the time in between. Children had grown, passed through school and popped out the other side of university, or were working their way through academia. There had been births and deaths, career changes and side tracks, marriages and unmarriages.
There was a great deal to catch up on in a few hours but it felt easy and comfortable. Chantal felt as if she had fallen out on the real life side of the looking glass and all was good. No Queen of Hearts looking to chop any heads off.
Chantal’s fist baby booties, along with matching bonnet. Purple was also the colour of the week for some reason.
We made exotic looking purple sweet potato and leek soup with parmesan flakes. See what we mean about this week’s theme colour !
Reflections on a talk
On Sunday we met good friends for breakfast and swapped reflections about a talk that three of the four of us had been to. We had ventured out in the evening to find out about a relatively new modality that turned out not to be that new after all.
As both of us (Matthew and Chantal) have a vocation in coaching and therapy and work with unhealed emotions, blocked states and blind spots, we are always on the lookout to learn more to add to our body of knowledge and tool set. No matter what we encounter we always learn something.
The process itself was not the cutting edge tool we hoped it would be. It is marketed as an innovative, speedy change intervention. It turned out that we were more than familiar with the individual elements of it, albeit not in its specific format. The experience, however, did give us pause to consider group settings, group engagement, how to encourage discussion and what gets in the way of that.
We were also reminded that people come to change work at different stages of their lives and personal journey. Depending on where they are and what they have been exposed to, certain modalities work better than others.
Connecting times with dear friends, Ilona and Rachel (right). Again, what’s with the purple, even the mural is playing along.
A melodic close
We closed out our Sunday and weekend by attending Johannesburg Opera’s Puccini Concert, held at Northwards House, a historical monument on the top of Parktown Ridge. The house was designed by Herbert Baker for John Dale Lace and his wife Josephine Cornelia Brink from Richmond in the Karoo. However, you may know her better as Josephine Dale Lace.
Herbert Baker is famous for designing numerous notable buildings in Johannesburg and South Africa including the Union Buildings in Pretoria, St George's Cathedral in Cape Town, both Roedean School and St John's College in Johannesburg and Rhodes University in Grahamstown.
Phenye, who runs Johannesburg Opera, and is an accomplished tenor, was joined by another tenor (Tebogo Makgwe), two sopranos (Khayakazi Madlala and Brenda Thulo) and a baritone (Solly Motaung). Along with accompanist Heinrich Alberts they took us on a beautiful melodious voyage through some of the more popular arias, and duets from Puccini’s well known and much loved operas such as Madame Butterfly, La Boheme and Tosca and others such as Le Villi, Gianni Schicchi, Edgar and La Rondine.
Working in the performing arts, especially something as non-African as opera is a hard slog in this part of the world. Little funding and even less interest in supporting such non-mainstream work has provided Phenye with plenty of opportunities to build his resilience and test his grit.
The sold out performance was testimony to Phenye’s unwavering belief in himself, his fellow singers and his passion for the art of opera. It was good to see others venturing out on a mild winter’s afternoon, as we were. We met several newcomers, who will be returning to future Jozi Opera concerts too.
Phenye in full flight, along with Brenda. A truly exquisite vocal experience and treat.
An encore is required
We were lifted up by this musical experience to a standing ovation with the desire for an encore. For our pleasure we were treated to a rendition of "Nessun Dorma," by all five of the performers. This piece is possibly one of Puccini’s most famous arias and usually performed as a solo. It filled us with joy.
A fitting close to a plump and fulfilling few days, the performance inspired us to venture out more. It’s time to escape the safety of a warm and comfortable home, we agreed, and committed to fill some of our spare time from the smorgasbord of art, theatre and musical events that are on offer around our city.
Until next time.
Yours in feeling,
Matthew & Chantal
Experience the ultimate journey in Emotional Mastery online! Our groundbreaking course, rated 4.94, will revolutionise your understanding and management of emotions.
You may also enjoy reading these
-
The window Arsenal struggles to close
Arsenal lost 4 matches in 3 weeks, each decided in the same 20-minute window. The Certainty Deficit explains why.
-
Why the Quad God Choked at the Olympics and Won Worlds Five Weeks Later
Ilia Malinin, the “Quad God”, scored 329 at Worlds and 156 at the Olympics. Five weeks apart. Same body. Same jumps. The Certainty Deficit explains why the Quad God delivered in one and collapsed in the other.
-
The Kick His Body Won’t Let Him Take
Manie Libbok kicked 73% for the Stormers. 58% in a Springbok jersey. Coach Rassie Erasmus spent two years engineering around the problem. The Certainty Deficit remained after all of it.
More articles from 5th Place
-
The emperor’s new emotions
Anthropic, the makers of Claude AI, missed a trick or two in trying to give Claude healthier psychology.
-
When He Said It Out Loud
Colson Baker stopped a show at the O2 Arena and said it out loud. Standing there with my daughter Darcy, something I’d been carrying for a long time got answered.
-
Why you feel worse after therapy & why it’s not your fault
Feeling worse after trying therapy or medication isn’t a sign you’re broken. It’s often a signal that the traditional approach is missing a crucial piece. Discover why your frustration is valid and how a different way, rooted in your body’s own intelligence, offers a path forward.
